Love… do I really know how to love someone? I know how to be in a relationship with someone. I know how to care about someone. I know how to let someone into my life. But I’m not really sure I know how to love someone. And it doesn’t matter what else I bring to the table, or whatever other good is there, without love, it is useless. (1 Corinthians 13: 1-3).
I’m talking about real love, sacrificial love – a love that is patient, that is kind, a love that does not envy, and is not prideful; a love that is considerate, putting the other first, and love that is not selfish, is not about seeking self gain; a love that doesn’t respond in anger, even when blind-sided or hurt; a love that forgives instead of keeping a tally of faults or failures; a love that is honest and true, even when the truth hurts, and a love that is actively protecting, and hoping, and working for the best (1 Corinthians 13: 4-7).
The truth is even when I start out genuinely caring about the other person, when things get tough, it is too easy to become impatient and selfish, too tempting to keep track of the wrongs, the embarrassment, the pain; too risky to not be selfish; too dangerous to continue to hope.
The only hope for learning to love like the picture in 1 Corinthians is to be perfected by God’s love for me, to let His love radiate through me and change my heart and my mind, to change my natural responses from one of selfishness to selflessness, to develop a new capacity to love based on His love, His patience, His grace that He has shown me. He is the one that is slow to anger and quick to forgive. He doesn’t keep track of our sins and He is always there even when we hurt him or grieve Him. He sets the example for me to follow, for us to follow, to show us how to love each other in a radically different way, with a life-changing kind of love.
Perhaps love is not just the missing piece in my life, but also the missing piece in our society, the piece that keeps us from moving beyond selfishness to building intentional connections and community, to really sharing life with each other and really caring about the other people around us. Ah, that sounds like another topic for another day. What do you think?
Wow! I have been dealing with this same topic lately. It began when I started reading the book the Love Dare and has continued on through reading the book Your Best Life Now.
ReplyDeleteNot only do I need to unconditionally love others (others being non-family members) but I also need to unconditionally love myself.
When in doubt I think of this phrase...Love me when I least deserve it because that is when I need it most. How true! I am so glad that God desided to love me even when I don't deserve it otherwise who knows where I would be. I am going to follow the example he has set for me and love others even when soceity deems that they don't deserve it because that is when the Lord tells me they need it most. Loving is so simple when you have a role model like Jesus to follow.
I definitely want to read The Love Dare... it may have some great tips and advice for putting this love into practice and intentionally choosing love even when we don't "feel" it.
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